Foolisher

A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.

- Douglas Adams

I don't get this one, can anyone explain?

The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.

- Mark Twain

Purpose of Hand

Hand: A singular instrument worn at the end of the human arm and commonly thrust into somebody's pocket.

- Ambrose Bierce

Honesty

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

- Mark Twain

Secret To Success

Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.

- Mark Twain

LifeStyle

A day without laughter is a day wasted.

- Charlie Chaplin

What a Man!

I don't always know what I'm talking about but I know I'm right.

- Muhammad Ali

Decisions

There are many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love, but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream - whatever that dream might be.

- Pearl S. Buck

Confucious or Confused?

Do not do unto others as you would that they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.

- George Bernard Shaw

Police Officers

Do you see this? N-Y-P-D! Means I will knock your punk-ass down!

- Will Smith

PoliTics

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.

- Will Rogers

The Same Life

I don't think I've mastered anything.I'm still wrestling with the same frustrations, the same issues, the same problems as I always did. That's what life is like.

- Harrison Ford

Nonsense

With fame I become more and more stupid, which of course is a very common phenomenon.

- Albert Einstein

Everything's Right

Optimism: The doctrine, or belief, that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly, everything good, especially the bad, and everything right that is wrong.

- Ambrose Bierce

hhhmmm...

Jealous: Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth keeping.

- Ambrose Bierce

Google Non-Sense

If you trust Google more than your doctor then maybe it's time to switch doctors.

- Jadelr and Cristina Cordova

Cause and Effect

Christmas begins about the first of December with an office party and ends when you finally realize what you spent, around April fifteenth of the next year.

- P.J. O'Rourke

Yes...

Those that know, do. Those that understand, teach.

- Aristotle

What's the Real Definition Of This...

Personally, I don't think there's intelligent life on other planets. Why should other planets be any different from this one?

- Bob Monkhouse

XD

There is only one difference between a madman and me. I am not mad.

- Salvador Dali

...

Our solar system consists of one star and some debris.

- Carl Sagan

More Tags!!!

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.

- Rich Cook

Was so Hard...

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

- Mark Twain

Poli-Tics

He knows nothing; and he thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.

- George Bernard Shaw

Burned!

Words are only painted fire; a book is the fire itself.

- Mark Twain

Games of the Generals

War is a game that is played with a smile. If you can't smile, grin. If you can't grin, keep out of the way till you can.

- Winston Churchill

>:)

When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.

- Mark Twain

Hatery

Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.

- Oscar Wilde

To See is To Believe

I know three things will never be believed - the true, the probable, and the logical.

- John Steinbeck

As Mostly Says

It is unwise to be too sure of one's own wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err.

- Mahatma Gandhi